Divorces may cause you pain throughout the entire year, but the holidays often result in even greater tension. If you dread spending your first holidays in Maryland after a divorce, try to follow these guidelines to reduce your stress.
Plans for yourself
If your divorce happened recently, the emotional aftermath may continue to take up your time. To get past the holiday season, start making plans in advance. Search out new experiences and hobbies, especially if you plan to be alone during the season.
Plans for your children
If your divorce involved children, the first holiday will involve greatly different routines for everyone involved as you adjust to custody agreements. To help make the transition go more smoothly for you and your children, consider the following tips:
- Avoid competing over presents with your ex-spouse.
- Understand that your extended family may see the children less often than they’d like.
- Encourage your children to make cards or buy presents for your ex-spouse.
- Avoid asking young children where they would like to spend the holidays.
- Try not to fight with your spouse during the holidays.
- Remain flexible in your schedule.
Establish boundaries
The first holidays after your divorce, you may receive what feels like intrusive questions from well-meaning family and friends. Be firm in your answers and inform the loved ones in your life that some topics remain off-limits.
New vs. old traditions
Many married couples suffer traditions they hate in order to compromise for their spouse. After obtaining a divorce, you no longer need to keep up with these traditions. Likewise, you now have the ability to embrace holiday traditions your spouse did not want to try.
Look towards the future
The first holidays after your divorce may cause you to be miserable. The attitude and actions you take during this period may determine how smoothly your future holidays will go.